Reflections On the Power of Clearing
The following is some of my philosophy that lies behind the Power of Clearing Process Clearing) and how I live my life. The lesson in A Course in Miracles entitled “In my defenselessness my safety lies” (W 284) is the core of my thinking and how I respond to whoever, and whatever, is going on.
I do not think about a boundary between you and me. I know you are one with me. If you ask me for something, or say something to me, I know I have attracted you and what you are telling me, in some way. Therefore, I strongly consider how I can say ‘yes’ to it. If something happens that I react against, I know I have something to release and I want to release what is in the way of us joining.
We all made up our own lives, like a movie or story, and we all have to work within that story. I do not ignore my anxieties and worries, but take responsibility for them. Every time I have an anxiety or worry, I go back to the truth or ACIM and tell myself that I made up everything that I feel, think, or believe about it.
I work with the meaning I gave to what happens in my life or around me. If I am triggered by it, I will still clear my upset and find its cause at a deep level in my mind. I will look to the beliefs I made up from three or four childhood traumas that I remember.
ACIM says: “I am never upset for the reason I think.” (W 8) Everything we are upset about has its meaning in some attack on myself, in the form of a negative belief. For example, I may be upset that no one left me any birthday cake because I always believed I am not good enough, that no one sees me, no one really cares, no one wants me to be around, or no one hears me, etc. So, ultimately, everything I am upset about is to do with my evaluation, blame, judgment or believed fear about myself. That is why I wrote the following kinds of sentences in the forgiveness part of the Clearing: “What I want you to forgive me for is for (for example) thinking you didn’t want to come to my house, which means I’m not lovable.” Ultimately, I have to forgive what I perceive every belief says about me.
I am constantly creating fear and guilt to keep me away from Love. That is my barrier to love, and we are here to clear the barriers that we have created to love, and to being, feeling and receiving love.
When people telephone me, for example, I know I have created it, that I have attracted it, at some level, whether consciously or unconsciously. This includes telemarketers. Therefore, I always communicate deeply with them. If they are in my path, I work with them in my mind.
If I do not like someone I would ask myself: “What do I not like about this person?” and “Whom do they remind me of?” Then, I would use a sentence in my mind that takes back the projection on them: “What I see in them (name of the person) that I don’t like about myself is…”, for example: “…that I constantly lose my patience if I feel hurt, or frustrated.” Ultimately, I bring it back to myself, because there is no one else to clear here, except myself. When I have fallen in love with the person I did not like, then, I know that I have cleared the projection I have placed on them from someone in the past. I would clear my way through it until I am in Oneness with them. I would not push them away, but go through clearing my own mind.
Each person we meet, we are destined to meet and have a holy relationship with, whether it is for a second, a month, a year or a lifetime. We each have come to teach and learn with each other. We must discover the purpose inherent in our relationship. There must be one or we would not have come together.
What we each have in our unconscious will emerge as we relate. What we need is a tool to clear our upset, projection or negative feeling. Everyone needs a set of tools to work with in their lives so that they can move to a higher level of love, peace, joy, oneness and freedom. Without these tools, we will always get stuck in the same circular pattern and, like a maze, have no way out. Everyone needs these tools, especially when we are in a relationship with another being.
We can get rid of the other person, tell them to go away, ask them to move out, or we can work with ourselves to clear at the deepest level. Most people want to do the former. It is the easiest ego method of defence. If I feel abuse, physical, mental or emotional, I ask them to stop. I will be clear in what I want and do not want and, if I feel it is a danger, I am still going to ask them to leave, but I am left with my belief. If we stick around, it is not okay to receive abuse, including emotional abuse, where someone says something to you over and over, which does not feel beneficial for either.
Whenever anyone is angry, they are feeling guilty, because anger is a projection of guilt. To release the anger in myself, I can ask myself: “What am I feeling guilty about?” and usually that would be something irrational that I have made up that has nothing to do with me in truth. If your partner, or your friend, is angry, you can ask them, in a very peaceful loving way: “Is there anything you feeling guilty for?” If you have an intimate connection with them, they will not receive the question as an attack but as support. You must have developed that intimacy in order to ask this kind of question. In a Holy Relationship, we want to have this mutual support, in order to help each other clear.
We are constantly going back to the inner feelings, things that have happened to us, perceived traumas, mostly to what has happened before we were seven years old. That is what we are actually releasing, the perceived meaning that we gave these incidents about ourselves, life, love and the world, in terms of our core beliefs, for example: life is a struggle, I have to work hard to get people to listen to me, no one sees me, no one cares. I made up my world and what the characters in it are doing to prove my negative ego belief to myself.
Watch a child under three and see how sensitive they are, how easily they cry. We are generating so many ego thoughts in a constant circle and that is why relationships are such a challenge to us. We want to release the ego thoughts we have about each other, because they are in the way of us joining. The ego’s purpose is to defend ourselves from being hurt and to create separation from each other and ourselves, that is why a holy instant is such a revelation, because we have so many separating thoughts to clear ourselves from.
If you can observe your thoughts, and not become your thoughts, you can see where your ego is taking you and how it is projecting fear and guilt constantly.
What ego thoughts, feelings or beliefs do you have to let go of to be fully present and to get 100% out of this moment, your process, day, experience with a friend, love affair or work today? Acknowledge them with complete sentences, for example: “I believe that because you didn’t return my email, you don’t like me and, therefore, I can’t be present or open with you.” Or: “I have to let go of thinking about my mother, if she’s okay at home by herself right now and whether I need to be there with her.”
There are two important rules in the training that I teach, which can be applied to anyone’s life.
Our egos are constantly misinterpreting what others say or do, according to our original belief system. Therefore, we have little accuracy in reporting anything, because it is so coloured by our individualised past. If you hold the space for someone and are present with them when they are going through their ego feelings, then they have a chance to release them. You can only do that if you see them in their true nature, which is as a Divine being, love or Oneness. Hold them in this Oneness, no matter what they are doing or saying in front of you.
I know I have something to clear if I do not want to have you over for dinner, for example, or let you sleep at my house. This means that I have something to clear in my perception of you, based upon a character in my past that I am projecting onto you.
You have got to walk your talk in order to have a totally congruent healing process. With everything you say to somebody, you need to ask yourself whether you living what you say; is that your practice?
You must listen to every word you say, to check how you are living and behaving because, ultimately, we are only teaching ourselves. There is no one else out there. Every person is an aspect of our Self and, if we attract them, we are to work with that part of ourselves that they are sharing, or bringing up in us.
To become proficient at the Clearing process, you must use it repeatedly, to see how your mind works: If you do not use it, go over it and play with it, it will just be an intellectual exercise. When you become proficient, you can clear any fear that keeps you in bondage and that is in the way of your (and our) freedom.
To think that you could hurt me in some way, do something against my will, or that something could happen to me against my will is the definition of the ego mind. Ultimately, this is everyone’s ego fear.
One workshop participant, Lauren, shared: “I’m afraid to stand on my own.” She noticed that she was constantly attacking herself by telling herself that she could not. It is important to acknowledge and bring up all your ego thoughts because we try to press them all down and block them out, and by doing that they persist stronger. “What you resist, persists.”
You can let up and out everything you are pressing down and let it go. You will need to share it with somebody who can hold the space with you so that you can empty your ego mind, let out your feelings, pain and negative beliefs, and they can still see you as Divine. That is the first stage of the clearing process and it has a very definite structure, or container, to hold the ego mind. The ego mind hates structure and always wants to change the words of the clearing.
Someone in the training brought up her ex-boyfriend. She had a traumatic experience with him, which went back to her mother and father in the clearing process. So, we cleared with her father and mother and she let go of the fear with her ex-boyfriend.
The ego mind is like a puzzle. The clearing process puts the puzzle pieces of what happened to you in the past into a container, in which you can then easily release your past pain. If you get the right thing in place, it can all fit like a puzzle and can clear. It is amazing how the Clearing can put pieces together that we would never know are affecting our present life. That is why many people have called it ‘turbo’ therapy, because the pieces fit so well and easily together. In many Clearings with people (and I have done hundreds of them), I am still surprised at how the different pieces fit together. Sometimes, we make sense out of someone’s whole life in just two hours.
Many people have deep issues about money — having, receiving, creating, or spending it, which came from deep survival fears from a very early age. I notice the beginning of the ego in my two grandchildren, who are aged two and four. But I notice how easily they can communicate their fears if I am open, do not believe them and stay in the present with them.
To complete this process, you have to find the essence of the story, what is really bothering you, to go to the root of what you think, feel or believe. That is what you clear on.
To live the way you really want, which is at peace, you have to change the way you function and the way that you see this. You have to ask yourself how do you really want to be?
Fear is ‘false evidence appearing real’ and when we acknowledge our fears to ourselves and another we can truly become aware of them, hear them, and then let them go.
You have to get off the treadmill of abusing yourself but seeing it as the world abusing you. The story is not the essence of it, so release yourself from it. Drop your attachment to the meaning it has about you — such as that you are not good enough. You need to clear the story that it is someone else’s fault. Otherwise you are going to keep experiencing the problem in another way.
The second stage of the process is forgiveness. The last is affirming the Truth. The only things that are actually true are the ‘big T’ things, and that is obvious from reading ACIM. The big T’s are Love, Oneness, Peace, Joy, Light and Divinity.
“Guilt is a sure sign that your thinking is unnatural.” (T 84) “Be vigilant only for God and His Kingdom.” (T 108-9) Keep your thoughts concentrated on ‘big Ts’.
“The holiest of all the spots on earth is where an ancient hatred has become a present love.” (T 562). When you have done the full clearing process with someone, as well as with the character you were supposed to heal with from your past (such as your mother or father), someone that you hated you may now fall in love with. There is no place or space where God is not present.
Sandy is an Internationally Acclaimed Workshop Leader, Life Coach, Counselor, Creator of The Clearing Process(™), ACIM-Based Real World Results Achiever, Matchmaker, Networking Maven, Proud Grandma, and Dog Lover.
Copyright Sandy Levey Lunden
Office: (360) 527-2796